Eva Longoria heats things up in the kitche

 

Can you cook? Eva Longoria can cook. Eva Longoria can cook up a storm. So much of a storm that she’s written a new book about cookery, and has been on telly in the states (and all over Twitter) asking people to buy it.

If we wrote a cookbook (and maybe we should!) it’d have practical things in there, you know, like stews. Curries. Stuff you can make for about 50p a head and taste great, but aren’t so complex that our tiny man-brains can’t handle the effort.

Or how to light a barbeque. Dads always seem to know how. Why can’t we do it without spending half an hour shuffling coals around with some old tongs, and huffing on the embers so much we’d pass out from s  moke inhalation if we’d managed to generate any smoke?

                                                                                                                                                           
 
Dodgy bloke in hat had committed another successful trouser theft

• The Desperate Housewives actress has spoken candidly about her affection for vibrators. And don’t you forget it.
• Longoria has had husband Tony Parker’s initials tattooed on/around her naughty bits. Probably regrets that now...
• She writes smut. Sort of. Longoria is penning an erotic novel, which may or may not be published one day.
• She is related to cellist Yo-Yo Ma. Nah, us neither.
  
  
  And cooking to seduce people. It works, and you should learn how to cook for that reason alone if you can’t do it already. Although probably you should learn how to clean down your kitchen sides and change your teatowel more than once a month, too.
  But we haven’t written a cookbook (well... not yet, anyway), and the recently-divorced Eva Longoria has. It seems like she forgot to wear trousers while promoting it, too, which is fine by us.
  These pictures were taken as she left the recording for David Letterman's show, which apparently doesn't require you to wear trousers. Maybe that's why he sits behind that desk so much. 
  The PR blurb on her book (entitled Eva’s Kitchen: Cooking with Love for Family and Friends, for those of you who are interested) says that, as she was raised on a ranch, she’s used to eating fresh, local food from the farms around her house. If we tried that all we’d get is old grass, dog turds, and the occasional slow-witted pigeon.